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Excavating the past

All day today, I was under the delusion that it was the 15th of the month instead of the 16th. And all day I’ve been trying to remember exactly who has a birthday today.

About half of all the birthdays that I celebrate are in May. (Many of the rest are in October. It’s weird.) So this confusion isn’t unusual. But as I ticked off my mental list — mom, BFF, both nephews, check check check…. I couldn’t figure it out.

Until a skeevy looking high school student in a denim jacket covered in buttons walked by.

Ah, yes! Dan B., my high school off-again-on-again-off-again-ad-nauseum boyfriend. May 15 is his birthday.

Dan was… skeevy. A messed up kid with a pathological personality, big brown eyes, and a pretty good line of bullshit. That I dated him (off-on-off-on) for four years indicates just how fucked up I was back then, a little more clearly than I’d like. Mining just how very screwed up our realtionship was would take days and would be embarrassing. I’ll refrain.

Last I’d heard of him, from a friend of a friend that kinda had heard a rumour (this was post college — he’d barely graduated high school and then sort of wandered off into obscurity) that he was found passed out on the side of the road out West somewhere with double pneumonia, inadequate clothing, and a case of malnutrition.

Frankly, I’d figured him for dead or in jail at this point.

In an idle moment during The Child’s unusually long nap today, I Googled him. Got lots and lots of hits. Googled his full name. Got no hits. Googled his name and my hometown. Got … wow, he’s on “Classmates”? Huh.

So I poked around there some and realized that you have to have signed up to be listed on that site. Well, that means he’s still alive — or was until recently. He’s got a profile and all I have to do to see it is sign up.

Well, wait a minute. What if he was looking for me when he signed up? (That’s not as self-centered as it seems… he really didn’t have any friends outside of me.) I thought for about two seconds about catching up, maybe he’s straightened himself out….

Nope. Even if he is the bassist for the cool blues band I found in the first fifty Google hits, I don’t want to dig that up. Not even to wish him a happy birthday.

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Categories: birthday
  1. May 18, 2008 at 12:35 am

    Seems like a lot of us have a skeevy boyfriend in our past. Luckily, or unluckily (depending on how you look at it), mine reaffirms my decision to stay VERY far away from him by appearing in the blotter of my hometown’s local newspaper every few months (my mother keeps me abreast of the “news”). Actually, it’s been almost a year since he’s appeared in there so I’m guessing he’s racked up enough arrests to stay in jail for a while.

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