Home > motherhood, other moms, preschool > I haven’t exactly been had…

I haven’t exactly been had…

My sister in law is a reading teacher in inner city New Haven, one of the worst slums in the U.S. She has been a teacher forever, including stints at Kindergarten and preschool. So I called her up to ask her about the Scholastic Book Club thingy.

According to my darling s.i.l., I haven’t precisely been had. It was sorta kinda a fundraiser…. maybe.

Turns out that Scholastic “takes good care of teachers.” For every dollar that we unsuspecting parents spend on the books, the teacher gets some number of “points.” She can then use those points to buy books. One assumes that the books will be used in the classroom. Yay books! Yay reading in the classroom!

However, and this is a big however, the books go with the teacher usually. Not the classroom. When my s.i.l. gets shifted from this school to that, from K to Reading Recovery, she brings her library with her. So if Miss P., the head teacher for The Child’s preschool, decides to hare off to a better preschool next year, say Wonder Canyon, the books go with her. 

Maybe.

I’m now sort of torn about this. There are a number of variables — it’s a good cause, it’s my daughter’s classroom, reading is important. But I pay a buttload of money for that place, can’t they buy their own flipping books without hitting me up for more? What’s the socially acceptable amount to spend? Will I get dissed if I don’t spend as much as the other parents? Those other parents own second homes — I can’t spend as much as those other parents! Then again, I bought $30 worth of books. Maybe I’m spending more than the other parents? Does that get me any special mom points?

On a related note, I mentioned that there are only two other girls in The Child’s class. Well, those two little girls are best friends and have been since birth — apparenlty their moms are good friends and neighbors, too. The moms — K and H — often arrive together and just start conversations in the middle, the way that old friends do.

Here’s the funny thing. H is always really friendly to me. She’s outgoing and easy to talk to and laughs a lot. I like her. I’ve never seen K without H around. But whenever I find myself walking or talking with them both — often, since we’re usually the first ones there — I noticed something.  K makes a point (a subtle point, but a point nonetheless), to turn the conversation away from general stuff and back to personal stuff between the two of them, conversations I couldn’t partipate in. 

At first I thought I was imagining it. But I started paying attention and yes, she was deliberatly excluding me from conversations, going so far as to put herself between me and H. (H, incidentally, is usually fine whatever is happening, conversation wize. She has a 6 week old baby, however, and probably isn’t at her best, mentally.)

Wow. A preschool mom for two weeks and already I’m being regarded as a friend stealer. It really is like being back at middle school. I’m tempted to bake some cookies and share them with H when K isn’t around, just to really indulge in the genre, you know?

This is the crap that made me dread eating lunch in the cafeteria when I was 10 and it’s the crap that’s going to make me cranky as an adult.

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